Monday, September 27, 2010


The carpenter has poor circulation so he sometimes gets bored feet.

A carpet layer will usually give you a square deal, but the drywall salesman always gypsum.

Beware of shady cabinet installers. Some of them are counter fitters.

The fellow who installed our French drains does his work with grate aplomb.

If you're uncertain about your floor plans, draw them up in pencil. It's quite remarkable.

I hired a bricklayer once. The guy was simply a mason! He said he learn from the best, his mortar and fodder.

I've been eavesdropping a lot lately but can't find a shingle builder willing to to pitch me a roof-erral.

To help us finish up the screened-in area around our indoor pool we wanted to hire a design specialist. I expected her to help us pick out some patio furnishings but I was mistaken. When she arrived she started in with a long winded speech. Turns out she was an interior deck orator.

If your computer isn't a Mac, please forgive my apparent jalousie. You should sill be able to read this because I took great panes to make sure these puns woodwork on windows and won't make it shutter.

Paint is expensive these days and you can easily loose your shirt. I nearly lost my coat and went flat broke when I tried to save some money by using the cheap stuff. Bad news. It would't feed right through the spray nozzle. I think it was a semi-globs.

My home has a solid foundation though. The slab is concrete and a rebar runs through it.

Gary Hallock


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