MILKIN' QUICKIES (Vol 30)

If someone makes money when stock market takes a dive, is he
considered a falls profit?

With everyone looking to economize in home appliances there's a new
kitchen appliance that can cook dinner for you when you take it into
your steam bath. That's right, the Sauna Also Rices.

Do female process servers sometimes suffer from subpoenas envy?

My mother cat had a litter of only one. It was born healthy but it was
very large. A few weeks went by and the baby grew fast and was soon
quite obese. I took the poor thing to the vet and told him the story.
His incredulous response? "You've got tubby kitten!"

Most American guys wouldn't go out in public wearing the clothes of a
Scotsman. You could get kilt! Of course if an American mans visits
Scotland and sees a cute tartan her native dress, that Macs a
difference. In fact if he plaid his cards right with her, he might get
lochy.

With so many newspapers going out of business these days, don't you
think the daily racing form is an unstable media?

After being fitted for a chastity belt, the young damsel became known
as a "Iron Maiden" because she was the ferrous in the land.

Gary Hallock