WHO KNEW MOON?

Only a small sliver of the moon was visible in the sky last night. I
found myself wondering, "Is it waxing or waning?" I decided to check
the page of the newspaper where such things are spelled out in
detail. Unfortunately that didn't really settle the question. The
overnight forecast called for a 50% chance of wane.

Gary Hallock

GARY HAS A TOTAL BREAKDOWN

Here is a "post-event" photo taken on May 20th documenting my annual not-so-nervous breakdown of the O.Henry Pun-Off backdrop. (Turns out it was just a stage I was going through)

For more photos of the actual event, please visit the official website of the International Save the Pun Foundation at www.punpunpun.com

(Photo by Brian Oakley - 2005 HL/LP Champion)

CHAMPION AT THE BITS (2006 Pun-Off results)

Here are the basic results from the 29th Annual O.Henry Pun-Off World Championships held in Austin, TX on Saturday, May 20, 2006.

PUNNIEST OF SHOW

First Place in P.O.S. went to Eirik Ott who scored a very rare 40 out of a possible 40 points with the judge, delivering a devastating rap-sung routine incorporating names of famous...uh...um...er... We may have to wait for the transcript to figure that out for sure.

Second place was awarded (by applause) to returning former champ, Jim Ertner, of Boston MA. for yet another in his inventive series of alphabetical compilations. Jim also scored an apparently not-so-rare 40 out of a possible 40 points. (Happy birthday, Jim.)

Third place was also determined by a tie-breaking audience clap-off between two contestants both earning 39 points. Upstart first-timer, Lloyd Dissmore of Kenosha, WI walked off with that prize by barely besting the bedazzling Denise Hazelwood of Buda, TX dressed as "Queen of denial."

HIGH-LIES & LOW-PUNS

After working his way through several grueling heats, veteran
competitor and multi-medal holder, David Gugenheim prevailed in a heated 3 way final battle claiming his first 1st place trophy as the threesome tackled the topic of "FLOWERS." Andy Balinsky and Arthur Simone claimed second and third place respectively.

mmMVP AWARD

Although Valerie Ward didn't survive past her first round of HL/LP action, her witty and rapid retorts in battle with the eventual champ
endeared her to her fellow contestants who gave her high marks for holding her own on the topic of "FOOD & COOKING." She went home with the coveted trophy and the admiration of many.

Corngratulations to all contestants and participants. The event was well attended and the weather was most cooperative. More details later. Watch the WWWebsite punpunpun.com for transcripts of many
P.O.S. routines and other interesting things.

The date for next year's contest has been set for May 19, 2007 at the
O.Henry Museum in Austin, TX. Visit www.punpunpun.com for more details

Gary Hallock

NO TELEPHONE COMMUNICATES WITH HIS CELL

I just bought one of those newfangled "Gilbertian cell phones."
There are no Roman charges but I do have to place all my calls
through a lung distance operetta.

(I guess I'd Buttercup my hand over the mouthpiece.)

Gary Hallock